But…
When younger. Before I even became Student Mental Nurse I had a daydream.
I was going to go to nursing college. I was going to learn to be a mental health nurse. It was going to make me a more useful member of society, I would be a better listener to my friends and family. Most of all though I was going to be surrounded by nicer people at college.
It turned out slightly differently.
I did become a more useful member of society, at least I was no longer walking the streets. I became a mental health nurse. It improved me and the way I related to people beyond all recognition. The decision to become a nurse remains in my top five good things list.
It didn’t make me nicer though. The other students weren’t as super nice as I hoped for. I was expecting angels; I got people. It should not have really been a surprise.
We divided initially into two camps; nurses & midwives.
What is the difference between a Rottweiler and a midwife ?
Rottweilers don’t wear lipstick !
I expected nurses being mostly women to be more less hierarchal, stupid and downright unpleasant.
Instead what I discovered was it was worse than an equivalent group of men. This holds for qualified nurses as well as students. Once you get any number together the bitching starts. Almost never in front of the person concerned, except drunkenly on the ward night out.
The hierarchy is quite important. All the different grades moan about the other grades. Assistants about Nurses, Nurses about Management, Management about Accountants. Wards about other wards. Day shift about the night shift. Any shift about the previous shift leaving jobs undone. Many examples of the fundamental attribution error can be seen.
The interesting thing is that this only seems to happen on wards where there is not enough real work going on. The bitching tends to revolve around things that can not, or will not, be changed. Like a comfort blanket of moany whining.
In todays world we now call it blogging.
Nursing did not make me a better listener either. The training & work give a perspective. Most peoples problems are not that serious compared to the majority of those involved in the system.
I find that also. I was expecting to be surrounded by “thinking people” in college.
For all of my adult life I was in an industry where there really are no women. I was fairly successful, and moved up in the ranks. To be able to make a difference, I had to be able to speak my mind and prove a point. I find now that by trying to speak my mind and prove a point that I’m labeled as argumentative. I had no idea I should have taken a drama class or two to be able to communicate with some of these people.