I often have to explain to other people that I am not a proper nurse. For example:
Friend: Hello, Mental. You’re a nurse aren’t you ?
Mental: Hello. Yes, I’ve been a nurse for many years, what stupid question do you have now ?
Friend: Not So Friendly: No need to be like that !
Mental: Just get on with it !
Friend: Huffy: Well I have a headache and the sniffles. I also have a budgie. My teeth are turning yellow and my breath smells. What is wrong with me ?
Mental: You have bird flu and you smoke !
Actually that does not normally happen. Normally:
Huffy: I am suffering from [random list of physical symptoms]
Mental: I’m not a proper nurse, if you have anything that concerns you just go to your GP.
Most of my idiot friends do not speak to me any more.
Our tutors at college spent years trying to tell us we were all proper nurses, well apart from the midwives. At the time I accepted this. I wanted to be a proper nurse.
Now I am not so sure.
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