February 2006

Have just got an email from one of my spies

Apparently a local acute ward has voted to ban smoking.

Totally.

For everyone. I presume this will include sectioned patients.

When the date kicks in I m going round with a bag of sweeties to watch the ensuing riots

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Sadly not as exciting as you may like. Having started a newish job I am yet again getting some of the same daft questions that people ask. You know, “what ! you actually let them out ?!”, “are they all violent ?“, “what are they like ?” and “they still do ECT ?”

The people that have not asked me questions like this are generally the ones sitting quietly waiting for me to psychically discover their own personal mental health histories.

So I was thinking. Where do people get all their odd ideas about the mental health system. The answer was blindingly obvious:

Television, Film and Telepathy.

I thought I would have a look at the first two.

What has film and television taught me about the mental health system ?

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Well there I was at stupid o’clock in the morning having just managed to pour lactulose where I really did not need it poured.

Mental (inside head): Hmmm, going to be one of those days.

Now you may call me superstitious … (did you ?) … but I think a morning starting with unpleasant sticky fluids upon oneself is probably a bad omen.

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Well there I was at this meeting.

I was thinking to myself this is how fear cultures are begun.

The meeting was essentially a stern warning and a reprimand; a strepirimand ?

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