diary

8.00 am

They just come into my room without knocking. It is time to get up. They lower the cot sides on my bed, removing the duvet cover wrapped around it first. Assisted to my feet I am taken to tiny toilet in my room. They stand beside me talking about their plan of action for the morning and how the night shift yet again have obviously sat about all night and done nothing at all.

Read the rest of this entry »

7.30 am

I get woken up by two staff. Very smart in their uniforms. I try to pull the covers over my head. It is very bright, the paper thin curtains don’t block the light. One of the staff gently prises the covers from my grip, the other pulls the curtains round the bed. Looking around the bay I can see three other patients still asleep. I shout loudly.

I am stripped naked and placed on a commode next to the bed. One of the staff stands in front of me to prevent me from standing up. The other starts stripping the bed. They chat about Eastenders. Just when they are about to drag me off the commode I start to do the toilet.

Given an all over body wash from a luke warm basin of water with skin dissolving soap. One of the staff holds my wrists when I try to punch the other in the ear. Much shouting. The staff talk to me and tell me what they are doing and why they are doing it. Efficiently they reuse the commode as a seat when washing me.

Eventually they dress me. Guide me to the hallway to let me walk up and down the ward. I try the doors at both ends. Locked as always. I try the office door, locked. I go back to try the exits again.

Other staff cheerily say ‘Good Morning’ and tell me how smart I look in my ancient shirt, faded tracksuit bottoms and cheap deodorant.

Read the rest of this entry »